Developing a Diamond Complex

Over the holidays, I got married. We didn’t want a big hoopla, so we had a small family-only ceremony. We like to keep things simple. We had enough to do getting ready for Christmas and family visiting from overseas. Smaller celebration = less stress. And we are all about less stress. 

Along those lines, when it came to wedding rings, again, we wanted simple. We started out with a local jeweler designing a Navajo-inspired turquoise and diamond white gold set. He explained there would be several steps – make a design, make a wax model, make changes to the wax model, finalize the mold, and make the rings. We told him we had a deadline – with all those steps, could he make it? He assured us he could. 

By the time we got to the first wax model, none of their time commitments had been met. Our guts told us to back away, and we did.

That left us scrambling. I suppose we didn’t absolutely have to have the rings for the wedding. We could have used Cracker Jack substitutes until we got the real deal. But we didn’t want the loose end hanging over us – more stress. We wanted to get married with our real wedding bands.

Tinah Dee Beautiful Jewelry came through for us. She crafted a set of gorgeous hammered white gold wedding bands that we both love. No stones at all, just the bands. Simple. Easy.

Now, two weeks later, what I did not anticipate was how many people, upon learning of my marriage, would immediately say, “Let me see your ring!” Although I love my new wedding bands (they are a “stacking” set), there isn’t a lot to talk about. No glittery rocks, no discussion of emerald cut, princess cut, solitaire or not, clarity, color, and carats. So it can make for an awkward moment when I show them a couple of white gold bands. What do you say? Most people just make some sort of “Ohhh,” or “Aha” noise and change the subject. 

I’m not sure what to make of it. Since they aren’t yellow gold, I could come up with a half-witty remark, like, “They’re crafted from the prison bars of my late cousin’s jail cell,” or, “We were able to get these with all the aluminum cans we saved up.” 

Still, it’s hard not to join in the diamond lovefest. If you’re a football fan, did you notice how many diamond ads there were this season? It felt like a constant “everybody’s doing it” message. At times after a commercial, I would wonder silly things like whether we were showing the world the true depth of our love by refusing to fork over several thousand bucks to Jared or Kay? 

But diamonds just aren’t my particular kind of best friend. I prefer black diamonds, the kind you find on a memorable romantic ski trip with a real-life best friend.

So that’s what we’re doing. A group deal, all-inclusive. Show up at the airport and they do the rest. Simple. Easy. Diamond complex be damned. ​

Holly Donaldson

Holly P. Donaldson, CFP® writes and consults on the psychology of money. Her fee-only, product-free financial planning practice focuses on increasing financial self-efficacy for those seeking a financial navigator to help them make good decisions. She is the author of The Mindful Money Mentality: How to Find Balance in Your Financial Future (Porchview Publishing, 2013) and publisher of the award-winning monthly e-letter, "The View From the Porch." With a fully virtual practice in Seminole, Florida, she primarily serves clients located in the Tampa, St. Petersburg, and Clearwater areas. Holly will also work with clients who are a good fit located elsewhere in the United States.

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